Don’t let it go the way you like doing, by saying, “Yes, it’s in my past, yes it’s gone, or yes, I wouldn’t like to relive it again.” Let it go through Him, through Christ, knowing that He gave up all that He had so that He could have you and so that you could apprehend Him. Let it go the way you let go of your sin when you walked into His love and eternal life, the day you believed that Jesus is the Son of God.
All that was said and wasn’t said, all that you invested and didn’t invest, all the love he gave you and the love you poured back, the heart he tore apart, the way you fell for him over and over again, the way you lost yourself in his love and his embrace and his kisses. Let it all go. Let it all go the way Jesus did on the cross, when he cried, “It is finished”, because it was, and it is. For you. Now,
Let it all go into God’s arms, because He died for a reason, and you need to start living like He sacrificed His life for something more. Let it all go into His arms because He said you should give Him that pain, because His yoke is easy and His burden is light, because by the stripes of Jesus you are healed. You can’t carry this load with you anymore, your knees and your back can’t take it anymore. Neither can your heart.
Let go and focus on finding you, the real you that you can only see when you begin to look at yourself the way your Father looks at you, not the way that he ever did or the way that he ever will. See yourself in your true beauty, not the beauty of your Afro or your jewelry or your chic style, not the beauty that you saw when he hugged you and said you are beautiful. See the beauty of your inner self, the unfading beauty of your gentle and quiet spirit, the one that is of great worth in the sight of your Father. See yourself in this beauty and let it arise within you, let it come to life and invigorate you with the Father’s presence. You are beautiful as you are, as He made you, fearfully, wonderfully, in His image, not by the words of his mouth or the touch of his lips. There’s nothing that he added or took away. There’s nothing he could ever add or take away.
Let it all go and fall in love with yourself. Fall in love with the woman you were called to be, the woman you were created to be. Fall in love with yourself as you grow in love, joy, peace, patience kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control, when from the overflow of your heart your mouth sings a melody to the Father, when your heart beats in harmony with His and you are so hidden in Him that you wonder how wholeness could taste this sweet. When it doesn’t matter that he had let you go, that he had moved on too soon, that he never thanked you for the flowers that had bloomed because of your presence, never acknowledged the fears that had been overcome because you had said you would hold him through the night.
Let go and count it all loss. You were not created for him. You were created for Him, that you may become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly, and that you may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection, that you may so share in His sufferings as to be continually transformed in spirit into His likeness even to His death.
Everything else is dead weight.
So let go.
Further reading as you let go:
A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George
The Lady, Her Lover, and Her Lord by T.D. Jakes
Thriving not surviving singlehood:
Sassy Single and Satisfied by Michelle McKinney Hammond
The Single Woman: Life, Love, and a Dash of Sass by Mandy Hale
Lady in Waiting: Becoming God's Best While Waiting for Mr. Right by Jackie Kendall and Debby Jones
Secrets of an Irresistible Woman: Smart Rules for Capturing His Heart by Michelle McKinney Hammond
Boy Meets Girl: Say Hello to Courtship by Joshua Harris
True Love Dates
The Single Woman
A Woman After God's Own Heart