Overcoming I

We sat together in the dark-lit room,
Him facing me and I facing him
He asked me what I would tell you if I saw you
If I had the chance to touch your stony-cold feel
Taste your shadows that linger in the past
In the present darkness

Sticking like a second skin to ebony
Like the green winter coat that she wore
On a sunny day in mid-January longing
For them to invite her to the circle
To hold her close and love her

I told him I would go to her
Ride the wave of time back to her side
Hug her close to my heart
And plant a kiss on her cheek
I told him I would tell her to block you out
Shun the voices that crowd her
Remember the happy days
When hearts will soar and compassion will come calling
And love, sweet love…

I would tell you that
You might taunt her
And break her
And grow a wound so deep
She will want to scream you to hell

But you will never overcome.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

(John 16:33)

We forget all too soon the things we thought we could never forget. We forget the loves and the betrayals alike, forget what we whispered and what we screamed, forget who we were. 

~Joan Didion, "On Keeping a Notebook", Slouching Towards Bethlehem.

Freedom

she’s been searching
wandering
longing
seeking a destination called freedom
freedom to know the joy of life
hear a still voice silence the harmattan

photo courtesy Lusha Zhou

dry her heart
blow
chaff
make teardrops
fall like drops of rain
drench the pain 

freedom is behind her
around her
cloaking her
coaxing her 

freedom to be free
free to feel the wind kiss her cheeks
free to feel pain yet live
free to heal
to walk
to run
to glance upon the vastness of the ocean
and see love
only love…

For Single Girls…

I've been thinking about leaving, how you'll leave, how you've left, how they always leave.

When I sat next to you in church today I thought you would pray for me. The pastor said, "Pray for the person next to you", and I thought you would hug me to you, whisper an ode for me, inflame a bygone love to fill my inborn longing, to mark me with your infinite touch, and commit me to His arms, to your arms.

Yet I was alone when I reached my hand over your back, let it settle on that perfect arch, where the bend of your spine told me to stop. I swear I felt your heartbeat. And a pool of your warmth settled on my palm, and I prayed for you, longed for you. Hungered for His love to fill your heart to fill mine.

Maybe you would watch me in white walking down an aisle to your embrace, maybe you would carry me over a threshold and make me yours forever. Maybe you would kiss me. Seal His love in your heart, on my lips, in my heart.

But you left. Left without saying goodbye, without a word, neither charming nor the prince. They said the ones who love God are the best. They were wrong. They were right. Because here I am with my love-lorn-heart, writing about how you'll leave. How you've left. How they all leave.

Fall in love with Him before you fall for him. You may never be his bride, or you may be his bride for a while. But you’ll be His bride for all eternity.